Microsoft Office

You sphinx, Microsoft
Office. Bedevil me so.
Extort my torn hair.

Proposal

Stay with me til death.
Even if you leave me then
it will be too soon.

Sriracha 2

Starchy Midwestern
night. Whispered flavor of dream.
Ghost of Sriracha.

Tyrannosaurus
Stomping through the Kansas snow.
Looking for a snack.

First Day of School

First day of school: learn
new rules. I've cried here before -
Triumphed here before.

Document Review

In my small pocket
of world, I withdraw into
smaller bureaucrat.

CNN

Every time I watch
CNN, I wonder why
I watch CNN.

Ithaka

As Odysseus
longed for Ithaka, so I
approached this stranger.

Poltergeist

Confront the demon.
Call him by name (Love). Bored, be
released from his thrall.

Road-Kill for Love

He mock-swerves into
cyclists: banes of road. I lust,
for man who listens.

Dating Profile

Ich möchte einen
Mann Gitarren spielen und
keinen Buch lesen.

Suitor

I want you to think
I'm cool and sane, not consumed
by weakness for you.

Cubicle

One Bizarro Me,
at least, must be having fun,
sexy adventures.

Legal Erotica

Butt-plug contract is
unenforceable, against
public policy.

I was challenged to write fan-fic haiku in a legal theme. It's actually a lot harder than it sounds. Law has so many syllables, it's hard to get a pithy punch line.

Erotica

Both his sexiness,
and his rash, slayed me: scorching.
Panty-combusting.

Professional

Critical time: if
I diminish more, I turn
hermit, no rewind.

Critical time: if
I diminish more, I lose
resource to escape.

Labor, Mouse-Like

Imagination.
is quiet now. Labor, mouse.
Decades - poof! - forget.

You, My Darling Ship

You, my darling ship,
have sailed - to your bright hopes - from
me: malcontent dud.

To Rasmus 2

She's prettier, more
sensible than me. But you
were my dormant dream.

To Rasmus

Your girl is lovely,
my sweetheart.  Arms wrapped in bliss.
On your hand, a ring.

Pyrrhic Victory

Pyrrhic victory
to age well.  For who will date
these fat baldies?  I.

Pyrrhic victory
to age well.  For who will date
my fat, bald peers?  I.