Dirty Laundry
I just had a big fight with my parents for the stupidest reason. No really, THE stupidest. It started off with what I thought was a funny anecdote:
Last Saturday at the bar/restaurant, I ordered an appetizer. The waitress brought me the check, and tried to pick up the check when she brought the food. I stopped her and said I wanted to pay when I was done. Is it because you think you're not going to be happy with your food? she asked. No, I said, I just think it's weird. Then she gave me a Look, and afterwards took FOREVER to pick up the check (vengefully I'm sure), so in return I didn't tip her.
My parents said I was too harsh, that I should have understood that maybe some people (like in the kitchen) were getting off their shifts soon and they needed to settle the bill quickly and split all the tips; they only get minimum, it's a tip-based job, etc. I disagreed, and gave a reply that sounded like a mix between Steve Buscemi's "I don't tip waitresses" monologue in Reservoir Dogs, and John Goodman's "Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one around here who gives a shit about the rules?!" in The Big Lebowski. First of all, I'm poor too, so the waitress' pity points don't go that far with me. Second of all, as long as the kitchen was open when I ordered, I should get regular service; I didn't ask them for any special favors or exceptions, they should still be on schedule, so normal rules apply. I mean, this isn't Nam, there are rules.
Then my dad said I was a hypocrite for saying I'm a Democrat and pretending to care about poor people when I couldn't even show consideration for my poor waitress.
I LOST it right then.
Two things about my dad, who is otherwise a super guy. First, I don't think he has any idea who I am as a person, and second, he can't stand it when I disagree with him. The two have often been related, in just about all of our past arguments. It must have been what first took the shit to the fan this time.
But if my dad had known me at all, he would have known better than to call me a hypocrite without expecting a reaction. In my book, a hypocrite is almost as bad as a tool (I bring it up because "tool" is a well-explored concept in this blog). I feel that most people close to me know how much I value truth and sincerity, even if my execution is flawed.
I also value kindness (though perhaps a little less), and I find it very upsetting that my dad thinks I'm unkind.
Last Saturday at the bar/restaurant, I ordered an appetizer. The waitress brought me the check, and tried to pick up the check when she brought the food. I stopped her and said I wanted to pay when I was done. Is it because you think you're not going to be happy with your food? she asked. No, I said, I just think it's weird. Then she gave me a Look, and afterwards took FOREVER to pick up the check (vengefully I'm sure), so in return I didn't tip her.
My parents said I was too harsh, that I should have understood that maybe some people (like in the kitchen) were getting off their shifts soon and they needed to settle the bill quickly and split all the tips; they only get minimum, it's a tip-based job, etc. I disagreed, and gave a reply that sounded like a mix between Steve Buscemi's "I don't tip waitresses" monologue in Reservoir Dogs, and John Goodman's "Has the whole world gone crazy? Am I the only one around here who gives a shit about the rules?!" in The Big Lebowski. First of all, I'm poor too, so the waitress' pity points don't go that far with me. Second of all, as long as the kitchen was open when I ordered, I should get regular service; I didn't ask them for any special favors or exceptions, they should still be on schedule, so normal rules apply. I mean, this isn't Nam, there are rules.
Then my dad said I was a hypocrite for saying I'm a Democrat and pretending to care about poor people when I couldn't even show consideration for my poor waitress.
I LOST it right then.
Two things about my dad, who is otherwise a super guy. First, I don't think he has any idea who I am as a person, and second, he can't stand it when I disagree with him. The two have often been related, in just about all of our past arguments. It must have been what first took the shit to the fan this time.
But if my dad had known me at all, he would have known better than to call me a hypocrite without expecting a reaction. In my book, a hypocrite is almost as bad as a tool (I bring it up because "tool" is a well-explored concept in this blog). I feel that most people close to me know how much I value truth and sincerity, even if my execution is flawed.
I also value kindness (though perhaps a little less), and I find it very upsetting that my dad thinks I'm unkind.
posted by Rex at 6:37 PM
4 Comments:
Sorry about your fight, Rexerella. You know, I've found that when people start brining politics in these sorts of arguments, it's almost like the forget that the person they're talking to is someone they know, and like (or, in the case of family, love). It's as if the political disagreement suddenly casts a fog over everything they know about you, and they can only see that one point.
But you're right: you're pretty honest with yourself, and it's not fair to call you a hypocrite. Sounds to me like it was a dispute with a busy barmaid, and nothing more. They're not called barmaids this day and age, are they?
Now, I think this is as good a place as any to request a definitive judgement on this issue: Kevin Federline- tool or douchebag?
Hm, I hope you're right that it was just a political caricature and not a character assessment. I hadn't thought of it that way before. Because if it's the latter, I would have trouble understanding how my dad could even like me - if he really thinks I'm a mean-spirited hypocrite.
Anyways, thanks for the vote of confidence.
Incidentally, dude, as a feminist I'd say "barmaid" is not the preferred nomenclature. "Serving wench," please.
Kevin Federline might have been a plain douchebag if he had left his wife and kids for a hot ass with big boobs and temporary beauty. HOWEVER, since he tried to use his wife and her resources for his success, recording a rap album, he is well-established in the tool ranks.
Can you believe that guy is already the father of FOUR kids?? Well, one is in utero, but unless she miscarries or something, it'll be four before too long. I sincerely hope that he doesn't represent the average reproductive activity for tools (and/or douchebags) on the whole... otherwise, we're even more screwed as a society than I had imagined.
"They used to call me K-Fed/But you can call me daddy instead!"
-an actual line from one of his songs
Tools do tend to reproduce. Haven't you noticed that everywhere you turn, there seems to be an asshole/douchebag/tool/dumbass to accost you? That's how it seems to me. -HDG
Post a Comment
<< Home