Hardcore Saved My Life

Last Friday concluded one of the tougher times in my life, as Snell & Wilmer offered me a job. The search has been going on for 2.5 months, with almost daily rejections, and I felt not only hopeless about finding security, but also inadequate as a student and a person. Through it all family and friends kept me from offing myself, and the hardcore ethos kept me going. I just wanted to document that, because it was very meaningful to me. I didn't turn to the bottle or seek escapism in partying; I kept putting myself out there, kept taking risks; I didn't get depressed and sleep all day; I studied hard and did all my homework on time and went to all my classes; I kept up my vegetarianism and ate healthy; I took ballet classes; I bitched and expressed my anger in art(ish - writing the law school musical); I kept in touch with friends; and most of all, I learned that I could make it NOT walking away. Two things I'd do differently - I'd exercise more and drink less coffee - but goddamn if it isn't hard to be hardcore! There's a reason we invented those crutches. I purposely went without coffee today, and it wasn't in me to do it all on my own. I promptly fell asleep again at noon.

Special ups to Comeback Kid:
Does it mean no damage done?
Not a chance in the world.
Cause there was never a day that went by without regret.
Turn it around.
The past still haunting me.
I gotta give it away.