In No Condition to Write a Joke

I almost died this morning! Two cars collided in the intersection, where I was waiting to cross the street. One car went to my right and the other went to my left and plowed into the sidewalk, about 15 feet from where I was standing. I didn't see it coming until I heard the crash. Then I started running away, but it wouldn't have saved me if the cars went in my direction, because there wasn't anywhere for me to go.